"He makes me want to turn myself in and rip out my own genitals"

Kate's got this knack for lying that still amazes me, even after four years of being lied to and seeing her lie to others (really, she's a sweet girl..). I only wish I could lie like that...but I"m pretty bad at it. Friday night we decided to go to a bar that we hadn't been to yet but that always has a line to get in. It turns out that's the place to be seen in Harvard Square. You'd think that with all of the Harvard kids around us that night, that Kate would make up something about being pre-med at Harvard, and how tough Professor Martin is this semester, but she again completely surprised me. We met these English guys, well blokes actually, and we're standing outside at the end of the night talking, and the next thing I realize, Kate's telling one of them how she's the VP of Clarks North America. She spits out a madeup name bragging that she knows the president, and even offers to show her imaginary business card. When one of them questioned her ("You're 23? You graduated in June?? Wow, you must be doing pretty well...") she modestly replied, "Yeeahhhh..."

It's quite the talent to be able to lie like that, completely straight-faced.

But the Kate stories don't end there. I'm loaded with them. I've probably told you some already, because it's so much more exciting than my life. Besides lying, Kate also has a tendency to sleep walk. Up until junior year, I had only heard the stories of her yelling at people she thought were outside of her window during the middle of the night, and other strange things I'm not allowed to mention. Then, on our term abroad, I shared a room with her for the first (and only) time, and witnessed it first hand. Early in November, very soon after we moved into our apartment, Kate did it again. We all woke up Sunday morning, Kate's door was open, and all of our condiments and our milk were nearly lined up in a row next to our refridgerator. So when she got a brand new bed on Thursday, I joked that she'd probably be sleep walking later that night since she'd be in a different bed. Thursday night I'm lying in bed, it was 11:30 or 12 and I couldn't sleep, but Kate had been in bed for an hour or two already. All of a sudden I heard her bolt out of her room and yell something that I didn't understand. From my bed, I asked what she said, and she told me she said "what are you doing." I didn't quite get it, and I asked her whether she was sleep walking and she rudely told me "no," and went to the bathroom. I thought something wasn't quite right, so I got up to see what she was doing when she got out. She told me that she heard the neighbors upstairs, and thought Helen and I were playing a trick on her or something, but kept saying she wasn't sleep walking, and eventually I felt stupid for asking so I went to bed. So fast forward to Friday night, and 6 beers in, and Kate decides to tell me she actually had been sleep walking, but I woke her up and she was too embarrassed to tell me then, but she couldn't remember what she had yelled when she busted out of her room at midnight, so she tried to make something up. She is a treat, and Helen and I are lucky to live with her.



Graduation is so much cooler when you're still stoned, so I'm told