Top Ten Philadelphia Eagles' Excuses:
10. "Spent two weeks practicing the coin toss."
9. "Discouraged by half time show's lack of nudity."
8. "We were missing 'Desperate Housewives'--who could think straight?"
7. "We're overwhelmed by the awe-inspiring metropolis that is Jacksonville."
6. "Oh, suddenly referees are too good to take bribes?!"
5. "Who really wants to get Gatorade dumped on them?"
4. "Should have campaigned harder in Ohio."
3. "It's totally unfair, the Patriots are really good."
2. "Maybe being from the land of cheese steaks ain't a good thing."
1. "When Tom Brady looked at us with those gorgeous eyes, we just melted."
I'd make a crappy cheerleader
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